You know that feeling when you’re booking your December break and genuinely believing that two weeks down South will somehow reset your entire nervous system? Yeah, about that. Spoiler alert: It won’t.
That crushing exhaustion you’re lugging around like an overpriced briefcase? It’s not going anywhere. And before you blame yourself for not “switching off properly,” let’s talk about what’s really happening here.
The numbers don’t lie (even if we do)
The Australian Bureau of Statistics (2022) dropped some uncomfortable truth bombs: professionals aged 45-54 in high-stress gigs like law are experiencing significant psychological distress at alarming rates. And here’s the kicker – it’s not getting better. The landmark ANU Lawyer Wellbeing research by Holmes, Webb, Tang, Ainsworth, and Foley basically confirmed what every senior lawyer knows but won’t say at the Monday morning meeting: we’re collectively running on fumes and calling it “high performance.” You didn’t claw your way to senior lawyer to feel this terrible. Yet here we are.
Why your holiday is already doomed
Here’s your holiday in three acts:
Act 1: You spend the first three days unable to move from the couch, feeling mysteriously flu-ish but without the actual flu. (That’s your body finally exhaling.)
Act 2: You have maybe 4-6 glorious days where you remember what it feels like to be human.
Act 3: Return-to-work dread kicks in, and you’re stress-eating Christmas leftovers while checking emails at 11pm on January 2nd.
Sound familiar?
The problem isn’t you. It’s that holidays treat symptoms while the disease keeps spreading. Burnout in senior legal roles isn’t a vacation deficit – it’s a systemic issue baked into how we work, lead, and pretend we’re fine.
Actually useful things you can do (that don’t suck)
The great responsibility audit
Grab a coffee (or something stronger) and list every single thing you’re responsible for. Client portfolios, committees, mentoring, that working group you forgot you joined in 2019. Now ask:
“Would the world end if I stopped doing this?”
If the answer is no, stop doing it. Revolutionary, right?
Boundaries (yes, you need them too)
Pick ONE thing that’s off-limits and actually stick to it:
• No emails after 7pm
• No meetings before 9am
• Tuesdays are for deep work only
• Sundays are sacred (yes, even during a deal)
Tell people about it. Then enforce it like you would a contract clause. The ANU research is clear: when leaders model boundaries, teams follow. When leaders model burnout, teams also follow.
Find your people (not at a networking event)
You need actual friends who understand what it’s like to be you. Not “strategic connections”—people you can text at 2am saying “I think I’m losing it” without worrying about it appearing in the partners’ meeting minutes.
Set up a monthly dinner with peers from other firms. Make it a standing commitment. Bring wine. Complain freely. Repeat.
Perfectionism is expensive
That extra three hours you spent making the memo “perfect”? That wasn’t excellence. That was anxiety cosplaying as professionalism.
Excellence serves your clients. Perfectionism serves your imposter syndrome. Learn the difference. Bill accordingly.
Get professional help (like, actually)
Would you wait until you’re having a heart attack to see a cardiologist? No? Then why are you waiting until you’re having a breakdown to see a psychologist?
Find a therapist or executive coach (or both) who works with senior professionals. Make it a regular thing, not an emergency measure. Normalise it. Talk about it. Your team is watching.
Do something ridiculous
Take up pottery. Join a terrible pub trivia team. Learn to surf badly. Sing karaoke terribly. The point isn’t to be good – it’s to remember what it feels like to be a beginner at something that doesn’t matter.
You’ve spent decades being exceptional. Give yourself permission to be magnificently mediocre at something fun.
Calendar block like your life depends on it
Because it kind of does. Block time for:
• Actual lunch (not “lunch at desk”)
• Thinking time (revolutionary!)
• Exercise (even if it’s just walking around the block)
• Doing absolutely nothing for 15 minutes (and I mean nothing. Very hard to do, but your mind will thank you).
If it’s not in the calendar, it doesn’t exist.
The leadership plot twist
Here’s the thing about being a senior or executive lawyer: your burnout isn’t just about you. It’s a cultural signal flare. If you’re fried, your entire team is probably combusting. The ANU research makes this painfully clear – wellbeing in law firms starts with leadership culture. You have more power to change this than you think. The question is: will you use it, or will you just book another holiday and hope for the best?
Your holiday homework
Take your break. Rest. Disconnect. Eat too much. Sleep in. Do all the holiday things. But when you come back, try something radical: don’t just return to business as usual. Pick ONE thing from this list and commit to it for three months. Just one. You didn’t become a senior lawyer by hoping things would magically improve. You strategised, executed, and made it happen. Apply that same energy to not burning out. Your future self (and your team) will thank you.
About the author
Margie Ireland is a leadership psychologist and executive coach who works with senior lawyers, executives, and their clients in professional services firms. With a rare combination of commercial acumen and psychological expertise, she understands the unique pressures facing leaders—from managing complex client relationships and driving firm performance to navigating the personal toll of sustained high-stakes decision-making. Margie is also the author of ‘The Happy Healthy Leader – how to achieve your potential even during a crisis’.
For more information visit www.margieireland.com
